Is She Over Him? 20 Signs Your Girlfriend Is Still Emotionally Attached to Her Ex

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If you’re falling in love with your girlfriend but feel like she might be hankering for her ex, you’re likely feeling miserable. Even though she’s assuring you that she’s over him, are you still getting the feeling that she’s holding out for a reunion? The truth is that everyone has a past, but certain signs can indicate that she might still be hung up on her former flame. There’s only one way to be sure. Look out for the signs and see if they resonate.

She Talks About Him Often

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If your girlfriend frequently brings up her ex in conversations, she hasn’t disconnected fully. Occasional mentions are normal and unavoidable sometimes, but constant references indicate unresolved feelings. It shows that he’s still on her mind more than you’d expect.

She Keeps His Photos

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If she still has photos of her ex displayed or saved on her phone, it’s a bad sign. It’s also plain weird. Holding onto visual memories suggests she’s not ready to let go of the past. It’s one thing to have old photos tucked away, but if they’re screensavers on her smartphone, she’s not ready to move on.

She Gets Emotional When His Name Comes Up

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Oh dear. That’s not a good sign. If she gets visibly upset when his name comes up, she’s far from being over him. Spontaneous emotional reactions reveal deep-seated feelings that haven't been resolved. Whether she gets teary-eyed or irritated, it shows that her ex still affects her emotionally.

She Compares You to Him

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Does she often compare you to her ex? It’s unfair on you and a sign that she’s still thinking about him. Whether she points out how you’re better or worse, the fact that she’s making comparisons speaks volumes. This habit indicates that her ex is still firmly perched in her mind.

She Stays in Touch with His Friends

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Maintaining friendships with her ex’s social circle can be normal sometimes, but it can also be a way to keep a connection with him. Maybe she’s testing the water and asking people if he’s missing her. If she frequently hangs out with his friends or talks about them, it’s a sign that she’s still involved in his life. It’s not healthy for a new relationship.

She Follows Him on Social Media

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It isn’t unusual to stay in touch with exes, but it isn’t common either. Most people want a fresh start, and that means few reminders of past relationships. If she’s still following her ex on social media and frequently engaging with his posts, it shows lingering interest. Liking, commenting, or even just viewing his stories can show that she’s still invested in his life. It’s a way of staying updated on his life without direct contact.

She Brings Up Inside Jokes

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Inside jokes can be uncomfortable at the best of times. If she’s always making references that only exist between her and her ex, she probably misses their connection. Moments like these can make you feel like an outsider and show that she’s holding onto their shared memories. It’s a sign she’s still cherishing their past.

She Keeps His Gifts

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Holding onto gifts or sentimental items from her ex is a clear sign she’s not over him. They act as physical reminders of their relationship, and if she can’t part with them, she’s still attached. It’s worth discussing why they’re still so important to her.

She Talks About What Ifs

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Yikes. If your girlfriend frequently talks about hypothetical situations involving her ex, she’s more or less telling you she still loves him. Whether it’s “What if we had stayed together?” or “What if we hadn’t broken up?”, it’s highly inappropriate to be discussing them with you. This behavior shows she’s still considering alternate outcomes. It’s time to rethink your relationship.

She’s Defensive About Him

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If she gets defensive or upset when you bring up her ex, she has unresolved feelings. Such a strong reaction suggests she’s still protective of their relationship, and she’s not ready to fully let go. Sadly, for you, she’s still emotionally invested.

She Keeps His Number Saved

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Keeping her ex’s number saved can be a subtle sign that she’s not ready to cut ties completely. It isn’t necessarily a dealbreaker, but if she insists on maintaining contact “just in case,” it’s worth questioning why. Is she fully committed to moving on? It looks unlikely. It’s a way of keeping the door open for future interactions.

She Mentions Him During Arguments

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Bringing up her ex during arguments is a tactic to deflect or compare. Comparisons are never a good thing. If she references him when you’re fighting, he’s still a significant part of her emotional state. She’s keeping him relevant in your relationship, and that’s not healthy.

She Attends Events He’ll Be At

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If she tries to attend events or places where she knows her ex will be, it’s likely to make you feel uncomfortable. She’s still interested in seeing him and maintaining a presence. Not good. It suggests she’s not ready to let go completely.

She Keeps Up with His Family

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While it’s not uncommon, staying in touch with her ex’s family can be a sign of lingering attachment. If she’s still close with his parents or siblings, it could be that she’s not ready to sever all ties. There are exceptions to the rule, but this connection keeps her involved in his life indirectly.

She Talks About Him When She’s Drunk

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Alcohol often brings out true feelings, so if she talks about her ex when she’s drunk, it’s a huge red flag. He’s deeply embedded in her subconscious, so it’s a bad sign. Drunken confessions can reveal a lot about true feelings. It’s a sign that he’s still on her mind.

She’s Hesitant to Define Your Relationship

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Is your girlfriend reluctant to put a label on your relationship? If she’s stalling, it might be because she’s not over her ex. Hesitation can show that she’s not ready to fully commit to someone new. Ask yourself if you’re happy with that, and your instincts will guide you.

She Keeps Revisiting Old Memories

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If she frequently brings up memories from her past relationship, she’s struggling to let go. Whether it’s talking about their trips or experiences they shared, these memories are going nowhere fast. She’s not ready to let go. It’s a way of reliving their time together.

She Hasn't Removed Him from Her Life

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If she hasn’t taken healthy and normal steps to remove her ex from her life, like unfollowing him on social media or deleting his number, it’s a sign she’s not over him. A new relationship should be a fresh start, and clean breaks are necessary. It’s important to establish boundaries to move forward.

She Uses Him as a Benchmark

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If your girlfriend uses her ex as a benchmark for everything, she has unresolved conflict. Whether it’s comparing your relationship to theirs or using him as a standard, there’s a lingering attachment. She’s not fully committed to moving on, and that’s not healthy for you.

She’s Emotionally Unavailable

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When you consider the previous points, if your girlfriend seems emotionally distant or unavailable, it might be the final stage in realizing that she’s still holding onto her ex. Emotional unavailability can indicate that she’s still processing her past relationship. Even if she’s over him, she’s not ready to fully invest in a new relationship. You need to decide if you’re prepared to wait around for her to make her mind up.

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