After the honeymoon period has passed, and the novelty of a brand new relationship starts to wear off, often the cracks in a relationship start to appear. Perhaps a passive-aggressive comment here, or an added criticism there, giving onlookers a glimpse of a slumbering resentment starting to rear its head. So, what is it that can make women start to resent their other halves?
Poor Communication
To spend so much time with one person requires clear and respectful communication. When conversation becomes stunted, or a partner is unclear on their plans, desires, or goals for the relationship, resentment starts to fester.
Lack of Trust
Infidelity, keeping secrets, and not being transparent can all cause a breakdown in trust in relationships. Many women count trust as a major element of a strong relationship, so when that starts to deteriorate, the bedrock of the relationship begins to crumble.
Uneven Share of Responsibilities
A sure way to breed resentment in relationships is the ongoing imbalance of responsibilities. Whether it be in the home, child-rearing, or financial tasks when one partner takes on a heavy load and another doesn't, frustration can start to build. Dated gender roles are still rampant in modern relationships, and this can cause a lot of strain within couples.
Financial Stress
At a time when money is tight for many, financial strain is all the more prescient in relationships. Sharing bills and assets is a lot for any couple to navigate, and when the stress gets too much, or there are disagreements on how to handle money, resentment festers.
Familial Stress
Families are complicated. Dealing with in-laws, differing ideas about childrearing, and responsibility for aging parents all add pressure to relationships. When a couple has a divided opinion on these issues, women can start to feel anxious and place some responsibility on their partner.
Differing Life Trajectories
Even in the most happy of partnerships, life can take the individuals in opposite directions. A career move might crop up for one, while an opportunity to travel comes up for another. It's not uncommon for women to feel held back by their perceived relationship responsibilities, or in the reverse, as though their significant other is following their own path at the expense of the relationship.
Feeling Unsupported
Generally, women are more open in giving and receiving support, emotionally and practically. If this manifests in the relationship, the imbalance it creates can spark tension and the catalyst for growing resentment. Feeling equal in support for one another is crucial to a thriving partnership.
Loss of Intimacy
In many relationships, the initial spark of passion starts to fizzle. This is true not only for physical intimacy but also for emotional forms too. Sharing, being compassionate, physical touch, and quality time are all forms of intimacy that many women find essential to a happy relationship, and so when this fades, questions about the longevity of the relationship may arise.
Over-Criticism
A gentle amount of feedback and holding your partner accountable is to be expected within a couple, and can even be an important way to demonstrate how much you care about your significant other. If this starts to tip into over-criticism though, picking at each other for small things rather than boosting each other up, the relationship can start to become toxic.
Emotional Distance
An important bedrock of any relationship is emotional closeness by sharing your thoughts and feelings with your significant other. Perhaps this is even more important for women, who are sometimes more in touch with their emotions, or open to sharing them. If they feel their partner is drawing away emotionally, closing off, or remaining distant, it can cause friction in the relationship, and over time, develop resentment.
Lack of Investment in Relationship Growth
A lasting relationship takes work. Growing and developing a connection requires investment and commitment from both sides. If a woman feels she is putting a disproportionate amount of effort into the partnership and that isn't reciprocated from the other side, frustrations may start to boil over.
Under-Appreciation
Everybody wants to be valued and respected for the work they do, both physical and emotional labor. Small gestures of appreciation in relationships can go a long way to cultivate respect and understanding. Without this though, the opposite is true. Feeling undervalued is a sure way for women to become resentful of their partners.
Control Problems
If a person in a relationship attempts to control their other half, whether emotionally or in their plans and behavior, things can get toxic fast. Many women hold their independence and autonomy as very important, and therefore if their partner attempts to take this away it can cause a breakdown in the relationship.
Differences in Priorities
As a relationship gets more serious, differences in priorities can start to become more impactful. Where one partner might prioritize building a family, another might focus on financial investments and career progression. This imbalance can cause tension when a couple is conflicting with their goals for life.
Insensitivity to Women's Issues
Women have very specific challenges to face. Misogyny, gender stereotypes, health issues, menstrual cycles, pregnancy, and hormones are just a few. When women find themselves in relationships with a partner who does not attempt to understand or support them in the face of these issues, resentment starts to build. Compassion and empathy are required.
Patronizing Behaviour
Relationships ought to be formed on equal footing. Two consenting adults with their individual lives, opinions, and competencies. When one person starts to condescend to another, perhaps suggesting their opinion or intellect is superior, the sense of equality diminishes and the relationship becomes far less stable.
Gaslighting
Gaslighting is when someone tries to convince you or manipulate you into thinking your version of reality isn't real. Unfortunately, this toxic behavior is common in relationships, and when a woman is a victim of it, this can ultimately break down trust and respect.
Unmet Expectations
Committing to a relationship often involves planning for the future, or agreeing on expectations from one another in terms of family, finance, where you want to live, and how you want your life together to be. Where one side strays away from these expectations, disappointment can fester.
Disrespect
A healthy relationship requires mutual respect. Without these things trust, empathy, and compassion crumbles. If a sense of disrespect for the woman in a relationship starts to emerge, the longer this continues the more resentment is likely to grow.
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