Language is extremely powerful, and sometimes, the phrases we use can unintentionally reinforce societal inequalities, including white privilege. While it doesn’t imply bad intentions when using these phrases, what seems innocent to one can be explosive to another. It’s just about being a little more mindful of our indoctrinated expressions.
I Don’t See Color
While this phrase is often meant to express equality and can be used innocently, it dismisses the very real experiences of people of color. We all have different experiences throughout our lives, and to dismiss someone of color undermines potentially hurtful experiences that they may have faced. Acknowledging race isn’t racist; it’s respectful.
Pull Yourself Up By Your Bootstraps
This day-to-day phrase implies that socioeconomic advancement is available to all of us. It sounds innocent enough, but on a deeper level, it suggests that everyone has equal opportunities to succeed, ignoring the systemic barriers faced by marginalized communities. Not everyone starts from the same place in life, and not everyone has the same opportunities.
All Lives Matter
In response to the Black Lives Matter movement, this phrase was thrown around freely, implying that Black people were expectant of privileges. The reality was quite different, and the phrase was both ignorant and dismissive. It overlooked the specific struggles of the Black community and the importance of addressing the unique challenges they faced.
I’m Not Racist, But…
In the same vein as the phrase, ‘I don’t mean to sound horrible, but…’, whatever follows this phrase is usually something problematic. Prefacing a statement with this phrase doesn’t excuse the implicit bias or prejudice it might contain. Even if the statement is innocent, it starts a conversation on a backfoot.
You Speak So Well
This phrase, when said to people of color, can come off as patronizing and imply that articulateness is unexpected from certain racial groups. It might stand up in a discussion with a French tourist who is learning English, but it carries negative connotations when said to a Black individual who has no reason to speak poorly.
America is a Melting Pot
Often used to describe the ethnic and cultural diversities within the US, it can celebrate diversity or imply assimilation rather than valuing individual cultures and identities. The context is everything with this statement, but when used improperly, it can ignore the distinct contributions and struggles of different racial groups.
Can I Touch Your Hair?
Asking if you can touch someone’s hair might be considered strange on any level, but to ask this question to someone with a different hair texture can be invasive and objectifying. It treats an individual as an alien-like being that requires close examination and poking and prodding. It isn’t an affable gesture unless you work in the hair industry.
I Had No Idea You Were [insert race]
While it might seem like a compliment akin to ‘I didn’t see your color,’ it can suggest that fitting into white cultural norms is preferable or that being part of a minority group is unexpected in certain spaces. It’s better to acknowledge race, it shows a transparency that is far more trustworthy.
I Don’t Have a Racist Bone in My Body
Racism is not about individual bones or isolated incidents, and many racist individuals have said the same thing. While that’s not to accuse anyone of being racist, the issue at hand is based on systemic problems and unconscious biases. This phrase ignores the complexity of racism and privilege.
You’re so Articulate
Similar to ‘You speak so well; this phrase can imply surprise that a person of color is well-spoken. Ask yourself, why shouldn’t they be? Don’t reinforce harmful stereotypes about intelligence and communication skills, it has no place in modern society.
My Family Didn’t Own Slaves
There’s never a right time to say this unless you’ve been asked the question directly. In its weakest form, it attempts to absolve individual responsibility for systemic racism and has no bearing on anything in the grand scheme of things. No one wants to be reminded of historical inequalities.
I’m Colorblind
Within the given context, the phrase is, of course, metaphorical in nature, but claiming to be colorblind ignores the real and lived experiences of racism. No one is blind to skin color, and saying otherwise is unnecessary. It’s important to see and acknowledge color to understand and address racial disparities.
You’re so Exotic
Speaking to a person of color as you would a Hibiscus plant is anything but the done thing. Referring to a Black person as exotic is likely to make them feel like outsiders in their own country. While it might seem like a compliment, it emphasizes difference rather than shared humanity.
Why Don’t We Have a White History Month?
Every month is effectively White History Month, given the focus on European and white American histories in education and media. White people are largely celebrated, and the key lies in recognizing under-represented groups. Black History Month highlights marginalized histories.
Everyone Can Succeed if They Work Hard Enough
This ignores systemic barriers like racism and simply doesn’t translate to the real world. While the Western world raises us to believe that we can accomplish anything we set our minds to, there remains in place economic disparity and unequal access to education and opportunities. This truly can prevent hard-working individuals from succeeding.
It’s Just a Joke
Excusing racist or insensitive remarks as jokes dismisses the harmful impact they can have on people. Humor should never be used passively when referring to a person’s race, culture, gender, or ability. It’s harmful and unnecessary.
You’re Playing the Race Card
This phrase invalidates the real experiences of racial discrimination and implies that someone is unfairly using their race to gain advantage or sympathy. There are situations when racism might be applied to an innocent set of circumstances, but it shouldn't be implied that this is always the case. It’s always better to gain a full understanding of the problem first. Often, concerns about racism stem from negative experiences.
But You’re Not Like Them
Using the word ‘them’ is never going to be validated by any group of people, anywhere. It instantly creates a ‘them’ and ‘us’ divide that separates the individual from both their racial group and the remaining population. It implies that the negative stereotypes about the group as a whole are valid.
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